Malt
The freelancer's guide to ghosting
Discover essential tips for freelancers to combat ghosting and maintain professional relationships.
No, you’ve not accidentally stumbled on to a dating website, and yes: Ghosting is a thing that almost all freelancers have to deal with at some point.
Ghosting - a term borrowed from the world of dating, is when someone you’ve been speaking to, suddently and for no apparant reason, stops replying.
In dating, perhaps it’s because they don’t have the bravery or respect to end things with you nicely.
In freelancing, it most commonly happens early on in a relationship with prospects - perhaps after you’ve sent a proposal.
You know the deal: you’ve spoken to the client, they’ve asked you for a quote, you’ve spent a few hours pulling together your ideas and costs, you send it over, and then POOF! No reply.
You give them a nudge. No reply.
You email again. No reply.
You wait a couple of days and wonder if the email got lost, or perhaps the client went on holiday?
Still no reply.
Unfortunately, ghosting is a common experience for many freelancers - leaving them wondering what they did wrong, or what to do next.
Ghosting can happen in the middle of a project too - communication simply stops, and you’re left wondering where everyone went, either in the first few days of work, or at any point throughout.
Even more unfortunately, ghosting can also happen at the end of a project too - once you’ve completed your work, and you’re waiting for approval or perhaps chasing an overdue payment.
Ghosting is a significant issue for small businesses. At best, it wastes our time, chasing for a reply. At worst, it means we’re left unpaid, and with a hole in our finances.
Whilst we aren’t going to condone ghosting - it’s important to recognise that most of the time “it’s not you, it’s me” - ghosting is less likely to be about something you’ve done wrong, and more down to a failure on the side of the client.
Many clients, especially during the stages of a project where a client is looking for a collaborator, can just be too busy and end up getting distracted by other priorities, and neglect to remember to come back to you. You’re not a priority, and their inbox keeps filling up ahead of their ability to reply to you.
Whilst it’s not a good enough excuse to not send you a reply - it’s a common reality that you might just be item 36 of 100 things they have to get around to.
Many times, if you’ve provided a proposal for a piece of work which they’ve chosen not to proceed with, some people can feel awkward or avoid having to say “Sorry, but no”, leading to putting off getting in contact with you. Again - this is no excuse, and a simple follow up would always be better than no reply at all.
From time to time, internal stakeholders move on, and communication falls between the cracks, especially if internal process is poor. This can often be the case in early stage ghosting, or indeed at the final stages of a project, especially if responsibility moves from one person to another.
The final reason is simply a lack of respect and professionalism. Despite having asked someone to put time and effort into something, they have got what they needed, and feel like they don’t need to continue to engage, or just aren’t thinking about the impact of their lack of action.
Whilst you’re unlikely to be able entirely stop potential clients from ghosting you, there are some things you can do to reduce it’s likelihood, and reduce it’s impact.
Based upon conversations with freelancers, here’s what can help:
1/ When sending proposals, include a clear timeline for responses - whilst it might not help clients reply, having a clear “end-date” of when you quote expires, or when you expect to hear back from them, means you can emotionally move on if they haven’t replied by that date.
2/ Arrange the next meeting in the first meeting - schedule your next conversation ahead of time, rather than once your provided your proposal, so there’s already something in the diary.
3/ Get a contract in place - make sure you have written contracts and agreements in place, so should your project proceed, your client is obliged to respond and pay, and you’re in a stronger position should they choose to walk away.
4/ Ask for a deposit - request a deposit as an upfront payment when your project starts, which helps the client commit to the work, and should they disappear, you’ve got some portion of your time and work covered.
5/ Build relationships in the business - don’t have a single point of failure, try to make sure you have other contacts in the business who you can talk to, should your direct contact disappear. This could be the finance team, for example.
6/ Know your legal options - if your client has ghosted you after delivery of work, make sure your contract says you’re still able to invoice for work even if they don’t approve it, or that your invoice is still payable, even if they don’t respond. Have process in place to reclaim debts, even in situations where they’re ignoring your emails.
7/ Learn how to move on - whilst it can feel like a personal attack, recognise that most of the time, ghosting is not about you.
Some freelancers can feel like being ghosted is a symptom of their work not being good enough - which is rarely the case. It can sometimes help to always assume you haven’t won the work, until a contract is in place.
If a client has been ghosting you for longer than four weeks, and you don’t have any debt to chase, it’s time to emotionally walk away, and move onto the next project.
8/ Diversify where possible - whilst giving up on a proposal is never easy, investing in multiple sources of income or new business helps to reduce the impact of a single project not converting.
In many instances, being ghosted is possibly a good thing. If they’re the sort of client who isn’t able to prioritise respectful communications with collaborators, just imagine what working together might have been like!
Whilst it’s hugely frustrating, freeing up your time to focus on respectful clients who are keen to work with you is a better use of time than chasing those ghosts who don’t have enough respect to reply.